This is not my usual newsletter regarding religious shame but I wanted to share my own thoughts and feelings about what is going on in this country because many of us are struggling with feelings of national shame and horror. As a therapist, I know how important it is to not only acknowledge and feel what we are feeling, but also to put words to them. The best word to describe my feelings today is grief. I know I am not alone is this grief. As you are all aware, grief is the natural response to loss, with many ways to experience and express it. Today we are witnessing and experiencing losses in this country that I never dreamed were possible.
I grieve for the loss of democracy as we have known it. It is like watching a loved one die from cancer.
I grieve for the loss of honesty, integrity, and decency on the part of those who are supposed to be leading this country.
I grieve for the loss of worldwide respect for our country.
I grieve for the loss of safety and trust in our communities.
I grieve for families being torn apart and for those who have died in Minnesota at the hands of ICE agents
Recovery from grief takes time. In the meantime, we grapple with how to respond in the face of our sadness, anger, fear, and hopelessness. I certainly don’t pretend to know what people should do and what will stop this madness. I do counsel people to take time to pause, take a step back and breathe. Reflect on two questions: 1) What is the truth of this situation as far as we can determine, based on evidence, not feelings, politics, or prejudice? 2) What is most important right now? Based on your answers try to determine what makes sense for you and what actions may actually help. God help us!